Hash N+340 "Praça dos Orixás Hash"

Sunday, 7th of June

🍻🐾 Welcome to Hash N+340: The Praça dos Orixás Edition 🐾🍻

After last week's adventures at PISAC, where some Hashers discovered innovation, sustainability, and several previously unknown muscle groups, we now head to one of Brasília's most iconic lakeside locations.

This week we gather at Praça dos Orixás, where the waters of Lake Paranoá meet spirituality, fishermen, capybaras, and confused Hashers wandering in circles looking for flour.

What could possibly go wrong?

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🐾 The Hare

This week's perpetrator:

Sperm Bank

Now, Sperm Bank has promised a beautiful trail with stunning lake views, easy terrain, and plenty of cold beer at the end.

Which, of course, means you should prepare for:

• Flour hidden with military precision

• Checks that lead nowhere

• Hills that somehow appear in one of the flattest parts of Brasília

• At least one section involving "shortcuts" that are neither short nor cuts

• A spiritual journey of self-discovery

• A close encounter with an angry fisherman

• And the traditional pack cry of:

"FOR F*CK'S SAKE, SPERM BANK!"

🌊 Local Wildlife Advisory

The committee reminds all participants that:

• Capybaras have right of way.

• Fishermen do not appreciate being used as trail markers.

• Offerings left for the Orixás are NOT Hash snacks.

• Swimming across the lake is not considered a shortcut.

• If you see a mermaid, you've either found the beer stop or become severely dehydrated.

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🔮 Spiritual Forecast

The Orixás predict:

🔹 80% chance of confusion

🔹 60% chance of unnecessary checks

🔹 40% chance of somebody ending up in a completely different RA

🔹 100% chance of beer

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Whether you're a runner, walker, crawler, religious scholar, amateur fisherman, capybara enthusiast, or simply a thirsty alcoholic with occasional sporting tendencies, come join us for another unforgettable evening by the lake.

Bring your running shoes, bring your sense of humour, and bring your forgiveness because by the end of the trail, you'll need all three.

 

ON ON! 🍻🐾

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🗺️ The Trail

🏃 Runners

No idea.

Good luck.

Bring a will.

🚶 Walkers

Approximately 6 km of premium disappointment featuring:

·         Getting lost

·         Blaming the hares

·         Blaming each other

·         Pretending you “know a shortcut”

·         Deep reflection on poor life choices

·         Miraculously finding the beer stop anyway

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🍻 What to Expect

🎭 Chalk Talk

Like a TED Talk…

…if TED was drunk, sunburnt, and confidently incorrect.

🍺 Beer Stop

That magical moment when:

·         your legs stop functioning,

·         your brain gives up,

·         but your liver proudly steps forward and says: “Don’t worry boys, I’ll carry us from here.”

🎉 Circle

The sacred Hash ritual consisting of:

·         terrible singing,

·         offensive jokes,

·         public humiliation,

·         recycled accusations,

·         and beer of suspicious legal status.

Nobody leaves with dignity.

Some barely leave conscious.

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🌦 Forecast

Expected weather conditions:

☀️ “Surface of the Sun”

Hot.

Sweaty.

Sticky.

Regrettable.

Hydration is encouraged but will mostly be replaced with beer.

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🧳 What to Bring

·         Sunscreen strong enough for nuclear fallout

·         No rain gear — dry season has arrived

·         A sense of humour (mandatory)

·         Your dignity (temporary and unnecessary)

·         Cash / beer money / emergency taxi funds

·         Possibly a rescue flare

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So lace up your worst decisions, ignore basic survival instincts, and come suffer with the rest of the degenerates.

Because remember:

This is not exercise.

It’s a travelling catastrophe…

…with a beer stop.

On On! 🍻🐾